Sunday, January 6, 2013

Them


Based on conversations recently overheard . . .

“I don’t get it. What is up with them? I mean, really.”
“I know. For real! They are crazy.”
“Crazy? They are idiots! Can’t they see it?”
“You’d think they would. “
“I know. “
“I know! “
“I thought they’d be different this time. I really did. But there they go again. It feels like Groundhog’s Day all over again.”
“I know! It’s like they never learn. You’d think by now they’d learn.”
“I know.”
“I know!”

“I’m done with them. Done! Finished. Fineet-o.”
“Yeah, for real. They can’t get anything done right anyway.”
“That’s right. They mostly can’t do anything, but then when they do something, they just make it worse. Maybe we are better off when they just do nothing.”
“That’s right. But I wish when they are doing nothing they’d get the heck out of the way rather than slowing down the rest of creation.”
“I know. And now I’m convinced.  I’m done with them. Done. I’m moving on.”
“Like my dad always said, ‘if you want something done right,’”
“I know, ‘do it yourself.’”
“Yeah.”
“Yup. You know, I feel better already. Best to just write them off.”
“Yeah. Who needs them, anyway. They just cause trouble, really.”
“Capital “T” trouble.“

“It’s just common sense really. And they seem to ignore it. Dismiss it. It’s like they live in some other reality.”
“Or like they are from some other galaxy.”
“Yeah, a galaxy where the laws of physics and common sense don’t apply.”
“Crazy.”

“You know, last week I was watching TV and one of them was on. What a frickin’ moron! I mean really, who the hell do they think the are? They have no respect for us and only care about their precious selves.”
“Don’t they know they are actually making it worse for themselves too? I mean it’s bad enough they are forcing their shit on us, but what is up with them? It’s like they are completely blind.”
“Not blind. Naïve. They are just plain naïve. And they just see what they want to see and ignore reality. Remember last year? It was the same thing. And the year before that. They are just making it worse and that can’t even see it. And it’s not like they’ve had every opportunity to make it better, ‘cause they have. They have had every opportunity. But they have only squandered it.”
“Like it was sitting on a platter for them and they squandered it.”
“Frickin’ squanderers.”
“Yup. Just thinking of themselves. Selfish. Greedy. Bastards.”
“Bastards! They are a bunch of bastards.”
“Yup. Selfish and greedy.”
“You said it.”

“You know what we should do? We should tax them. Add a 20% tax. If you are one of them you just have to pay more to compensate the rest of us for their stupidity. At the end of the year when they fill out their tax forms they have to check a box and if they do, then we just add 20%. Simple!”
“Yeah! That’s it!”
“I can’t believe we haven’t thought of that before.”
“I know. And I like that plan, but you know what they’d do?”
“What?”
“I’ll tell you what. They are such a bunch of weasels they’d figure out some way to get out of it and put the burden back on us. That is what they do every time.”
“Frickin’ weasels! They make me so mad.”
“Me too. They do it every single time. I am really, really mad at them.”
“Frickin’ weasels.”
“Weaselly frickin’ freeloaders.”
"They are that for sure: Freeloading frickin' weasels."

“You know some days after I’ve been listening to their BS, I don’t know, it’s like I just feel like giving up. Like there is no hope as long as they are around.”
“I know. It’s like they keep on doing the same ol’, same ol’ and expecting something magically will work.”
“And it won’t.”
“Nope. It won’t work at all.”
“Nope. In fact, if they keep doing this, they are going to destroy us all. And as long as they are here then they are just gonna keep on pulling the same shit.”
“I know. It’s depressing.”
“Yeah. Really depressing.“
“I think of my kids. Of your kids. And what kind of world are they going to leave for our kids?”
“I know. And they don’t even seem to care.”
Seem to care? They don't care. That’s the thing. They don’t care about us at all. They only think of their smug little ‘selves. They think they know what is best and dictate it to all us. Well you know what? They don’t. They don’t know anything about us. Nothing. And that is what pisses me off the most.”

“But what can we do about them. I mean really. It’s not like we can ship them all off to some other country. Could we?”
“That would be awesome! Or maybe we just send them all to California or Mississippi. They’d all be happy together and we wouldn’t have to deal with them anymore.”
“Yeah. Yeah! Think how great that would be. We wouldn’t have to worry about them getting in our shit and we could finally live the way we want to.”
“Man-o-man. Life would be so much better without them. All the things we want to do but we can’t because they are always getting in the way.”
“And you know what, maybe we wouldn’t have to ship them all away, just the really hardcore. You know some of them, once you talk to them, can almost be reasonable. But some of them, and you know who I mean, are completely off the reservation.”
“I know.”
“I know!”
“Those are the crazy ones. Not just crazy-crazy, but bat-shit crazy.”
“Yeah – if we could just do something about the bat-shit crazy ones, then the others might listen to us. Maybe they could actually see our side.”
“Yeah. It’s like they are scared or something. Scared to think for themselves. Just listen to logic. But those crazy ones just keep feeding them a bunch of crap and making them so scared they are paralyzed.”
“Yup. Paralyzed. Like they can’t even make up their own minds.”
“You wonder if those bat-shit crazy ones have some sort of hypnotic power over them.  Some sort of mind control.”
“Right, I mean, how else could you explain how they are?”
“Pathetic.”
“For real.”
“But if we can ship off the bat-shit crazy ones, then the others, the ones that are just crazy, those others we might be able to talk some sense to.”
“Yeah. That would be good. We don’t want to throw out the proverbial baby, just the bath water. Right?”
“Yeah. Then we would really have them to deal with anymore. How awesome would that be?”
“It would be awesome.”
“Yes it would be.”
“Awesome.”
“Agreed.”

"I dunno."
"Me neither."

"I hate them."
"Me too."

“Ready for another?”
“Sure.”

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